John McElhenney How To Survive A Divorce In A Positive Way

Coping With Divorce in a Positive Way With John McElhenney

Coping With Divorce in a Positive Way

John McElhenney joined us to talk about how he was able to develop a positive perspective while he was going through his divorce. John is a single dad who lives and writes in Austin, Texas. John is also the Divorce editor of The Good Men Project and is a contributing writer for the Huffington Post. During the show we talk about:

  • John’s epiphany that radically changed his thoughts about being a father in a positive way.
  • How he got clarity about making decisions during his divorce.
  • His realization about becoming a “Whole Parent” and the most important thing that he did to become one.
  • How John processed his emotions while going through his divorce so that negative thoughts wouldn’t impact his kids.
  • Learn John’s mental “Judo move” that changed his mind set about his divorce.
  • How your kids view what you are doing during your divorce and how that will impact their lives.
  • How he talked to his kids about some of the good things that came out of his divorce for him and his ex-wife.
  • John talks about how his parents’ divorce impacted him on how he was going to handle his own divorce.
  • How writing and journaling helps you get perspective on your thoughts and relieves some of the depression that comes with divorce.
  • How he was able to grieve during his divorce.
  • 3 things that John did so that he could cope with his divorce. These are techniques that John used to keep him distracted and let him have fun.

John recommends Brene Brown’s book Daring Greatly: How the Courage to Be Vulnerable Transforms the Way We Live, Love, Parent, and Lead

Another good book to check out is Iron John: A Book About Menby Robert Bly

Learn about the benefits of journaling here

We also recommend watching Boyhood.

John has published several books of poetry, his most recent book Impossible Love Poems: Love, Loss, Rebuilding, Recovery, Divorce, Dating, & Hoping for Love Again. He also wrote The Twitter Way – Book One / LIFE: Twitter As A Way of Enlightenment a whimsical look at social media. He makes his living writing social media strategies ( for small businesses.

Make sure to follow him on twitter @wholeparent

You can also check out his Facebook page

Scott Lopez Interview on Mental Toughness and Divorce Coping Skills

Scott Lopez: Mental Toughness And Coping With Divorce -Over Divorce Podcast

Scott Lopez Discusses Mental Toughness And Coping With Divorce

Scott Lopez is a former Marine Corps Officer and fighter pilot, has MBA in International Management, and is highly competitive Brazilian Jiu Jitsu athlete.  Scott has been divorced twice and shares his insight on how he was able to develop a strong mental outlook to help him get through both his divorces.

Scott provides great advice on coping with divorce by talking about:

  • How your thoughts are at the pinnacle of who you are and how they control your emotions and behavior.
  • How to take responsibility of your actions during your divorce so that you are more empowered.
  • The importance of being prepared for the divorce process.
  • The value of expanding your social circle and how friends enrich your life during and after your divorce.
  • How to make progress in your life by developing your competencies: Knowledge, Skills and Attitude
  • The process of thought patterns. How thoughts lead to emotions, which lead to actions, which lead to results, which lead to new thoughts.
  • Scott discusses his formula of success which include:
    • The importance of having a long term vision for your life.
    • The need to have an action plan to take you in the direction that you want to go.
    • The ability to be tenacious and to persevere.
    • The requirement to always be learning and be open to new ideas.
  • How being accountable for your actions can accelerate your growth.

Scott recommended The Work of Byron Katie, which can be found at:

Scott lives in California where he raises his two daughters half of the time. He now coaches individuals and business executives how to develop mental toughness to think better, perform better, and increase earnings and profits.

You can find out more about Scott at

You can check out his Facebook group at