Divorce means change and that means ups and downs in mood and attitude. That’s the focus of this episode of the OverDivorce Podcast.
Tom and Adrian discuss the E-ticket ride that is the emotional roller coaster of divorce. Being terribly sad , then happy, then sad again. Adrian notes that one of the hardest parts is thinking that you’re OK and thinking you’re over things. Then Out of nowhere something come up and sneak up on you and rip you back down to a new low point. Tom notes that being aware that moods pass helps get through it. The key is detaching from those moods and letting them pass.
Adrian then cites the importance of mediation as a means of maintaining an even mood. He goes on to say that what he’s learned about meditation would’ve helped him significantly over the past few years.
Tom discusses the potential positive effects of using a rubber band as a means of reminding yourself when you’re ruminating or obsessively thinking thoughts that aren’t helpful or constructive.
Adrian details some of his experience with the rubber band technique and observes that it was actually quite helpful in mediating his mood.
Adrian and Tom sky the shortcomings of using chemicals to help distract you from thinking too much. The effects are short-lived and tend to make things worse in the long run. Tom shares some guilt about anxiety and worry being first world problems and Adrian discuss Maslow and how emotionally we can’t tell the difference.
Exercise and social engagement are discussed as more effective tools in the battle against excessive anxiety. Mind hacks as a means to begin engaging in either exercise or social activities are described- for example the method of just starting can be a big help engaging the mind in a task that it was once was resistant to.
The hosts discussed the difficulty of getting started any kind of task when depressed. They discuss the e-book available on this website. Its contents are described– specifically small things that you can do right away -in less than 60 seconds- to make your life a little happier, lighter and easier during a very difficult time.
The transcripts are available here